Thursday, September 13, 2012

Evil Clowns

 

'Cause I can't look at a sewer without seeing his clown face!
 
[Not Johnny's - duh - read on...]

OK, so an evil clown isn't really any kind of supernatural entity... or is it?

Let us explore...

What makes a clown? What are they, if not ordinary [not so well adjusted] human beings dressed up for the amusement of children and their families?

 
 
Red noses, painted faces, rainbow colored hairdos and psychotic smiles.
 

If all of that wasn't enough, add the fact that they go around having laughs at your expense [and what weird, shrilly sound their laughter is].

Pop culture is brimming with freaky looking clowns provoking all kinds of anxious reactions in children as well as adults.

Fear of Clowns is not that new [Coulrophobia, is the official term]. I guess it always had to be present, although the name wasn't formally acknowledged until the eighties and it doesn't really show up in texts on its own.

Wiki says that, "... clowns are universally disliked by children. Some found the clown images to be quite frightening and unknowable", and I couldn't agree more.

Most of us shed these uncertainties behind our fears as we grow into adulthood, but there are those that carry a remnant of it ways into their grown-up lives.

Who can blame them?
 
 

Harlequins, I can tolerate, but clowns... there's just something about them.


In The Simpsons episode, "Lisa's First Word", Homer tries to build a bed for Bart after he outgrows his crib, and makes him one with the giant face of a clown as a headboard. The not so fun bed triggers insomnia in Bart, who keeps repeating "can't sleep, clown will eat me". The phrase became an Internet meme and has inspired the Alice Cooper song, "Can't Sleep, Clowns Will Eat Me".
Scary? Yes.
Supernatural? Not exactly there yet.

Movies then? You must already guess where this is going.

 
Let's have a looksie at our old friend Pennywise. [You know, the pirate toothed monster clown from the movie adaptation of Stephen King's infamous "It" novel].

 
 
The nameless being exploits the fears and phobias of its victims in order to disguise itself while hunting its prey. "It" primarily appears in the form of a clown [looking a LOT like poor Bozo] in order to attract its preferred prey, young children.

 
[So it's not an actual clown, but since it chooses to
assume the exterior form and appearance of one,
I'm making it fit into this category.]

 
Clowns are supposed to be funny, friendly characters that liven parties and amaze in circuses. Even though we may be instinctively afraid of them, of the unknown person behind their painted mask, our brains always try to make sense of things by letting us know that, "it's okay, they're harmless".

 
 
But, then a movie like It or Poltergeist comes out and we're back to square one, right back to where we started, scared little kids waiting for our mommies to come and take us away from the scary looking dude in the Rainbow Brite costume.
 
 

In conclusion, most clowns are creepy as hell!

[I mean, what's with the ridiculous dancing and the jumping around and the blatant disrespect of boundaries and personal space? Not to mention the thing with the balloon animals!]


Hey, but at least Sam's evil clowns turn to glitter when you whack'em.
 

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